No escape from old emotions. Self-Forgiveness is the key.

Breathing helps to stay here. I have been experiencing this swelling of emotions/movements within my heart area, not cool. It is as if I am going to cry or something, some kind of a sadness. I mean its all energy of emotions, past thoughts, memories, feelings, etc, they have been pilling up and kept secretly hidden inside, never really dealt with them. So, as I walk this process, such hidden treasures are surfacing upwards, not cool and cool at the same time. 


So tonight, self- writing is about writing some self-forgiveness lines. There is nothing like self-forgiveness, man oh man, its me giving to me, self-For-Give after all. 


Amazingly there is a strange reluctance to self-forgive, even after been on this process for a while now, I do feel that resistance at times, the cure is just write/speak the self-forgiveness out, don't give into the resistances. So, tonight, self-forgiving on the swelling of emotions within me, that strange movement of motion/emotion. Got to let it go. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel a sense of swelling inside my heart area.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to permit a swelling of emotions within my heart area.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let a swelling of emotions build up within me, instead of stopping it in the moment, I allowed it to continue.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let a swelling of past memories and emotions to rise within me. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let a something swell, boil, build within me, causing a movement of sort. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let emotions build within my heart area. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let emotions and feelings arise within my heart area. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let thoughts, emotions and feelings build up within me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cause a swelling of emotions to happen.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to permit a swelling of emotions to happen.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have caused this swelling, i have created this.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that i am the creator of this old feelings.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in thoughts emotions and feelings within me and allow them to build up. In that i am the real creator such swelling.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that i am the maker of my own stuff, nobody else build that swelling within me. i mean who could have made that swelling of emotions within me? me and me alone is the creator, i have build it, made it within me. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize by participating and giving into mind stories, i have allowed the creation of emotional swellings to occur within me. i am my own creator. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize i am my own creator. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build up old emotions within me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build up old memories within me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build up old feelings and thoughts within me.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build up old thoughts emotions and feelings within me. 


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the pain i feel within me is, i have created for myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that i am the maker of my thoughts, emotions and feelings. 


I breathe, I am the breath of life here. 


So when and as i experience that emotional swelling within me, i know, it is my past thoughts, emotions, and feelings coming up to be released, no need to panic, no need compound it further by thinking more about it, rather, I breathe breathe and breathe, feel the physical body, here, and be here. I am here.


When and as I sense that sadness swelling within my heart area, i know, its the old stuff, i simply breathe, not participate in any more stories about it, which will only compound. I am here.